Being and staying in Love
To love is easy. Being in love is a different ball game altogether. To fall in love all you need to do is nothing. You just see a girl do regular stuff and the regular stuff feels like the most extraordinary and beautiful thing to you. Then you think about her, fantasize about her, wonder about her, imagine talking, dancing, walking, etc with her and you realize that you are in love with her. Or at least severely infatuated with her.
But what is truly difficult is staying in that state of altered reality. Imagine me in such situations. I would find the stony gaze of her as she passed without noticing me, not once but all the time. Oh that's lovely. How graciously she refuses every request of mine for a cup of coffee at a local coffee store brings me immense happiness. How I plunge into a sea of joy when she refuses to sit beside me in a bus that is crowded but for a lone seat by me. How sweet her voice does not sound when she does not pick up my numerous calls. And so on... These do make it difficult for any love to sustain itself. You usually persist with the doggedness of a bull or a chimpanzee but not a dog and continue following your lady love, in vain. You think that if you are determined enough she may give in. Sometime in the future. You console yourself that if you don't try she will never love you. By chasing her like a dog chases a car you at least have some chance
|The picture is deliberately misleading. So is the piece here. So, yeah, sorry about that. :D|
Well, to be honest, you have a chance. As much chance as a street dog chasing a car has of getting a lift to his or her street corner. That's your place. But the world is erected on a platform of hope, a substantial part of which is just hogwash. But it still stands that way. And I am being generous and gentle here. Your mind is the biggest devil in is case. He will trick you into buy gifts for her. That is the best trap and companies know that. So you find super expensive pens, bags, teddy bears etc for grown up ladies in gift stores that you know have no other purpose but to kiss and makeup. Or in your case to not kiss and not make up. Of course she will not accept your gift. It makes no sense. If she does, you will conclude that she likes you now. Only now her appetite for gift will increase and she will continue to ignore you knowing full well that you will gift her for just that. If she does not accept it, you will deduce that she did that just because she is upset with you. In reality it usually is not that you upset her, it's just that you mean nothing to her and accepting something from a no one is ridiculous.
Yes, that's your place. Instead get a beer and code on.